Most, if not all, of the courts in Collin County, Dallas County and Denton County require the parties to mediate before going to trial.  Even when mediation is not required, I almost always recommend to clients that they attend mediation.  Mediation allows you to come up with creative solutions that a judge could never order.  It also allows you to have control over the final result, which a trial does not give you.

Probably 90-95% of my clients are sure that mediation is pointless going in, as they know that neither party is going to compromise enough to reach a settlement.  Yet somehow 90-95% of the cases that I take to mediation end up settling.  There is a reason that mediators have jobs.  If the parties and attorneys could settle cases on their own, mediation would not be necessary.

Typically at mediation, my client and I sit in one room and the opposing party and his or her attorney sit in another room.  At most mediations, we never even see the other side.  The mediator (who may or may not be an attorney) goes back and forth between the rooms to try and help the parties reach a settlement.  By definition, the mediator is neutral.  If the mediator takes sides, he or she will almost certainly lose the ability to negotiate with the other side.  The mediator will often play devil’s advocate in both rooms.

In my experience, the best family law mediators are attorneys with extensive family law experience who know the judges and who know what the most likely outcome at trial is going to be.  They also have a very good grasp of the Texas Family Code to be able to guide the parties when they want something they would never get in court.

Mediation is a slow process.  Although some mediations can be done in half a day, I have been in mediations lasting anywhere from 8-13 hours for family law cases.  The mediators generally provide snacks and lunch.

Occasionally I hear from people who are interested in mediating without lawyers.  Although this may sound like a good idea in theory, it can be a dangerous proposition.  Mediators cannot give legal advice, even when they are attorneys.  This can really cause a party to be blind in the negotiating process, as he or she will have no clue what the law is or what he or she is really entitled to.

Overall, I think mediation is a wonderful process and very helpful in reaching amicable resolutions in family law cases.

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Temporary orders can be entered in any family law case to govern what will happen with various different aspects of the case while it is pending.  Temporary orders can relate to both the child(ren) and other financial matters.

Typical temporary orders related to children in either a divorce or custody case include: (1) designation of conservators as either temporary joint managing conservators or temporary sole managing conservator / possessory conservator; (2) the possession schedule be for the child with each of the parents; and (3) whether child support will be paid and, if so, how much.

Examples of additional financial matters to consider for temporary orders in a divorce case are: (1) who will get primary use of the marital residence; (2) how community bills are going to be paid during a pending divorce; (3) whether or not one party will pay temporary spousal maintenance to the other; and (4) who will get primary use of any vehicle(s).

Temporary orders can also govern how the parties treat each other while the case is pending and what is said or done in front of the children.  Temporary orders can either be reached by agreement, or they can be ordered by a court after a hearing.  Temporary orders hearings are like mini trials.  In Collin County, temporary orders hearings are limited to twenty minutes per side, which can really limit what you can do.  In other counties, such as Dallas County and Denton County, you are often given significantly more time for a temporary orders hearing.

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Many Texas counties have “standing orders” that apply in every family law case filed in that county.  Dallas County, Collin County, Denton County and Kaufman County all have standing orders.  Tarrant County for some reason does not have a standing order in family cases as of the date of this post.

Standing orders set forth the ground rules while the case is pending.  In divorce cases, they prohibit parties from altering or selling property, or for spending money for anything beyond normal living expenses and legal fees.  In custody cases, standing orders can include provisions prohibiting you from moving the child’s school or prohibiting you from having an unrelated paramour spend the night while the case is pending.

When suit is filed, the standing orders must be attached to the original petition.  Although each county’s standing orders are similar, they do have their unique differences.  Therefore, it is very important to read the standing orders for your county.  For example, at the time of this post, Denton County’s standing orders require parents in a divorce to complete a parenting class within 60 days of the filing of the divorce petition.  Collin County used to have a similar requirement, but it no longer does.

Standing orders can eliminate the need for a temporary orders hearing in many cases because the court already provides many of the orders you would be seeking.  However, if you wish to do something against the standing orders, you need either the agreement of the other side or a court order allowing you to do so.

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